did you know taht the hmuan biran can raed wrods no mtater waht odrer the lteters are in as lnog as the fisrt and lsat lteters are croerct?

azamnig noh???!!

banda banda

You better get ready
For a big surprise
You think it’s almost over
But it’s only on the rise
-Parokya ni Edgar-

ganahan jud ko ani nga kanta oi kay kataw-onon kayo. Prangka kayo ang lyrics ug igo dayon sa punto. Nindot pud ang banda nga Parokya ni Edgar kay sila nga banda mora rag mga ordinaryo nga tawo. Kita kaayo ang barkadahan sa grupo charuuzz..wa ta kahibaw daghan diay silag problema sa ussag-usa, aw ana man jud na pero para nako mayo ni sila kay morag dili plastik ang mga miyembro. Nindot pud ug tukar. Grabe nakog pagdayeg ahh mora man kog sinuhulan. Ahehe..
mao na kadtong didto mi ni papa sa Surigao nya usa sa mga events kay free open air concert sa Parokya ni Edgar . namugos jud ko na motan-aw, assusshh kadaghan tawo pag adto namo, naghuot jud. Uli na lang mi oi, napay Papa nga ga apurar pag-ayo hehe.
Mayo ra sad siguro to nga nanguli mi kay pagkabuntag ingon man nila nga wad aw nadayon ang banda kay naay bomb threat. Tinuod ba kaha to noh? Sige ra ba tog binuang ang kauban ni papa. Tinuod siguro to, wa may suga ilang airport didto gud…pwede I-konek tarong?? Hehe
Next time will be about kenshin himura…so so so happy today..

horrible week.

badjaos

badjaos dive for coins at piers. here's a scene and yet another...

remembering final fantasy high school eskapos

whenever sang my song
on the stage on my own
whenever said my words
wishing they would be heard
i saw you smiling at me
was it real or just my fantasy
you'd always be there in the corner
of this tiny little bar

my last night here for you
same old song just once more
my last night here with you
maybe yes, maybe no
i kinda like it your way
how you shyly place your eyes on me
did you ever know
that i had mine on you?

oh my gulay! sigh oh life

11:45pm
I’m lying on my stomach on a bed in a ship traversing the Limasawa channel already halfway to Surigao where I’ll be witnessing the Bonok Bonok Festival. The ship left at 7pm and we’ll be seeing the lights of Surigao Province at about 4am tomorrow. Can’t wait for daylight.
I slept early inside a room filled with double deckers but woke up after two hours roused by my own disturbing thoughts (I’ve had too many restless nights), the bright lights (there;s one right in front of my face as I am inches away from kissing the ceiling), and the snores from the gentlemen as well as the ladies that can, believe me, move Mt. everest to the island of Fiji (my father joined in the loud chorus of ngoork ngoorks Lol).
Since I couldn’t close my eyes in restful sleep wonder anymore, I decided to get out of the room and just well, get out of there.
Hmmm the sea with its hypnotic sound, aromatic delight and gentle swaying motion. I love the sea! I should live in an island…wait a minute I DO live in an island. Hehe. I stayed in the corridor for a while looking out to the distance where the lights outline the city of Maasin. I look like a scene from Titanic, my all time favorite movie/love story (Jack, don’t let go. *shivers*) I wanted to go to the captain and suggest "full speed ahead! Don’t worry captain. I bet you there are no icebergs in these waters."
The water is as black as oil, as dark as the night leading one to think of things thought of as belonging to the dark side. I was thinking if I jump off the ship, would anyone jump after me for the sole intention of saving me from drowning, from being torn apart and then swallowed by sharks (that place is known to have so many), from being ripped to pieces by the ship’s propellers, from being ushered by the waves to a far off island to live as slave in exchange for my flesh for hungry cannibals with strange rituals and loud drums? Would anyone save me not because he/she is thinking of becoming a celebrity (that happens you know), or that he/she wanted to show off diving and swimming skills, or that he/she wanted to show off his/her new swimming gears or that..it’s selfish ol’ me again. But wouldn’t it be nice if someone forgets everything, leaves everything behind for you knowing that his/her attempt might end up in vain or something like that…sounds like a song to me. And why do I have to jump ship in the first place? I have no idea. Lol.
A crew member came up to me, probably reading my thoughts a moment ago and engaged me for a little chat. He pointed to this island and that, told me of the ship schedules, a bit about himself and his work. He told me how sometimes dolphins would come up from underwater and chase the ship at daytime! That must be very exciting, but he didn’t sound excited though. While we were chatting I couldn’t help but be bothered by his bopping up and down. Oh well, anyways he said "unsay ngalan nimo?" And I had the strongest urge to say, "Rose." (but please don’t be the Jack.) But I didn’t.
After a few more minutes out in the corridor, looking up the night sky, hoping for a shooting star to wish upon but the heavens were holding back those twinkling gems of night from me, I went back to sleep. Man, I daydream even at night.

Professores Emeritusis

monday last week:
I shook hands with Dr. Resil B. Mojares today. Oh but wasn’t I the happiest? I felt giddy and excited when we slowly approached him and a bit embarrassed when his unbelievably soft hand pressed against my own sweaty and not to mention although I’m mentioning it dead cold at that moment palm. It’s an honor to be there during his induction as Professor Emeritus (although I don’t know exactly what that means) but being able to touch, in the form of a momentary handshake, the hand that created works world renowned makes for the best moment in my 2005 life.
What comes with the Professor Emeritus title? The emcee offered to say free parking space? He’s a funny one, Mr. Boholst. Dr. Mojares himself thinks its one of the advantages but so too is being able to check out books from the library even though he’s not anymore connected to the university. And as long as nobody blows the whistle to the librarian, he will continue to check out books whenever he likes.
I can think of other advantages too. One is people laugh at your silliest jokes (although Dr. M really was very witty and funny). But whenever Dr. M says something that, I would bet my glow in the dark stickers here, he never intended to sound funny some people would find humor in it. As if the little boyish smile he projects is cue for some to LOL, Laugh Out Loud. Hehehe Another advantage I can think of is that everything you say is valued and most often documented. It sticks to the mind of some people (for those having memory loss save it to their cell phones). I still have no idea what Professor Emeritus means or what comes with the title.
Dr. M gave a brief overview of the making of his recent yet to be released work on the History of the Disciplines in the Philippines for 20 minutes or so but cut himself short when realizing that he might as well be narrating the more than 400 pages of his book to the audience composed mainly of members of the faculty and a few students required by their Literature teacher to attend. (Probably sensing that the silence inside the room is due more to boredom than intent listening or honest interest, forgive me doc guilty there.) I wasn’t bored, I was just engrossed in my own thoughts.
I kept memorizing the lines I would say to him after his talk, "hi Dr., I read your compilation of essays and I think the essays are both entertaining and informative. I just want to say thank you for the pleasure I get from reading your work." I envisioned myself giving him a firm grasp and looking straight into his eyes while saying those words. Ngeek! All I could do when the moment came was to stand there and show him all 32 not so pearly whites of mine. Silly girl.
He concluded his lecture with these words (remember advantage number 2? Safe in my phone outbox.) "I used to believe that the life of the mind is very important. I still do." With that, everybody in the room took off from their seats to give him a standing ovation. (Clap, clap, clap)

ang tanga *bow*

i'm in an internet cafe in the neighborhood because i chenchededeng..locked myself out of the house. how can i be so forgetful of something as important as the key to the house which might as well be the key to life itself? Lol where is sanity when you need it? where oh where.. hehe
well it's i good thing i didn't leave the compotent on, the stove burning or the computer running. * i was thinking of leaving the compotent on, the stove burning and the computer running before i accidentally( or is it the gods playing games at me..maybe not gods, ghosts perhaps Aba! it's grandparent's day pala, could it be that my parents' parents shoved me out of the house and turned the knob in safety angry maybe that i hadn't greeted them on this day? explains the sudden appearance of a moth in the bathroom.. ahh superstition! taasa gud aning naa sud sa parenthesis Lol) locked myself out. again good thing i didn't.
i went to see kaycee and we spent time together, fed on mr. softy, and as we do over and over and over again, it's an endless, hopeless cycle, went to the furniture department and imagined ourselves buying furnitures for our apartment. but with kaycee, i need not fear being redundant and all. ngek, we talk about the same thing everytime we meet and we never get tired of it.
i left my keys at the house, my diskette (i should be posting my trip to surigao uh hmm Lol, first time in the Land of Promise.., my meeting with Dr. Mojares and my 20 pesos) i'm broke but still spending 20 pesos an hour in an internet cafe. what is life without internet? it'll be like cellphones with no built in games Lol.. sometimes we need a bit of distraction. well, that depends on your make up of course. what am i talking about?
about the mail.. i got a puppy! it's very cute and cuddly.
the internet in the house isn't working thanks to my tinkering fingers that split open the phone wires and rearranged the neat color coded tubes. so i bought, with kaycee, a new phone wire. oh well. i gotta go, im out of money.

live coverage from surigao

actually there is nothing i can do except to run to this internet cafe across the pension house and write something coz the rain's just keeping me from doing things i wanna do.
i received mail yesterday. cute. i think i'll give it away.

i am a broken person

Spending too much on cellular phone cards, internet cards and even one useless, stupid phone card has left me broke and bed ridden. Lol
My parents left for Manila two days ago and won’t be back until Monday so I have to make do with the little allowance my father left me which has already become so little I couldn’t buy sugar coated peanuts on the street side. I could if I want to walk the hour or so ride from school to home.
I need to find a way to raise money; hmmm money makes the world go ‘round. I could get a job as tutor but my father won’t be too happy when he learns about it. I tutored Koreans two years ago and didn’t tell my parents about it. I eventually told my mother and made her keep it secret but she told my father anyway hehe. He didn’t act like he already knew what I’ve been doing but I know that he felt kind of disappointed.
The Koreans were staying in Cebu for vacation, we (Doris and I) tutored them for a month before they left for their homeland. I wasn’t so much in it for the money as for the chance to exchange culture with the East Asia people although it was part of it. I suspect that the Koreans also wanted that cultural exchange more than the desire to learn English which was the reason why they posted an ad in our school bulletin boards.
I took a summer job when I was 17 at City Hall. I didn’t like it. I go to the office sit all day doing nothing then go back home wondering why I feel so, so tired. Sometimes I arrange files or get grocery items for the regular employees or buy food from the outside for them like I’m some waitress taking in orders. I was so amazed at how menial work is distributed to different employees when the office can do with just 5 or 6 people.
One employee does the typing, another does the printing, one keeps files another send files to the bossing to sign. Most of them gossip around. A funny mister is the driver of the service vehicle, a fashionable employee handles those who want to take exams and yet another woman just sits on her chair fussing over her hair and make-up then gets up at 2 o’clock for her gym session and so on. Plus us, summer jobbers who are astounded by the scenes inside a government office, makes the office room too crowded. There are obviously too many cooks in the kitchen. An applicant will have to follow up his papers for not less than a month and sometimes if he is unlucky, his application papers would get lost somewhere in the process of having it go through on too many hands.
At the end of the month, I wasn’t too happy with my salary. I didn’t deserve it but grateful still with the money. I bought a good pair of shoes.
I have to have money on foundation week. I’m going to get a henna tattoo on the hip area with the word earth in Chinese characters. Lol. I’ve only 200 pesos left! What to do? What to do?
Mr, Cantones, the instructor on marketing management which I took last semester, the wig master, told us of a very morbid but profitable business. Selling body parts.
I can’t recall exactly how much one whole human body costs according to Mr. Cantones but it was an 8 digit number in dollars. The most expensive part, a million peso answer at Game Ka Na Ba, is the bone marrow. Do I have excess bone marrow I could sell?
He told us of body parts being transported to different regions in the world. Imagine eyeballs or whatever eye parts, hearts, lungs, livers, brains, nerves, limbs maybe even hair roots *lol inside resealable plastic bags sitting comfortably at the back of the plane. If you see a med looking person aboard a plane or ship, you ought to be suspicious.
Maybe I could sell one of my kidneys, but what if somebody in the family needs it? My lung perhaps? My father smokes a lot, he might need mine. Liver…I don’t want to have only a fraction of a liver. Brains? Lol, I don’t have one silly hehe. Heart? I’m reserving it for somebody I do not know yet and it’s not for sale. Eardrums? Can’t, I need to hear music. Tongue? Who’d want to buy a tongue anyway? Well if it’s my tongue you couldn’t imagine the value they’d put on it. It’ll be worth more than all the super powers combined. Spine? Are you crazy? Tonsils? Well, they always swell from my constant chewing of sweet delicacies...no no if I sell them I won’t have anymore bumps on the neck to touch. Involuntary muscles? I actually like the twitching movement in my cheeks and legs and eyelids. Eyes? The windows to my soul, no way anime! Hair? It’s my crowning glory. Varicose veins? Now that’s a good idea lol. Teeth? Only if they grow back again in seconds. Do I want to sell or not? Do I want money or what? Hmmmm…I wonder if there’s demand for nail clippings…

Seek and you shall not find (don’t seek and the more you do not find)

september 3

I found the keys to my drawer at last. It was lying snugly beneath a few sheets of paper. I spent the whole morning yesterday looking for it. I swear I scoured carefully the table top and found nothing resembling the old keychain with its aging bronze color and the carved out lionfish of Singapore spewing water from its mouth. I swear I moved all the books on the table which my father the inventor made more than 10 years ago looking for the keychain securing two keys. I even lifted some books up. I scanned behind the huge binder (I’ve never used since my aunt gave it to me almost six years ago), moved the Purpose Driven Life on top of the Auditing Theory Vol. 2 (both I’ve started to cover in clear plastic a month or so ago but never got to finish due to shortage of plastic adhesive tapes), checked beneath the 2 miniature rubber turtles* Kaycee gave me for my birthday which included a seaweed of monochromatic orange and I moved the pencil that almost gave me a panic attack during the midterm exam. Then there’s the clear book in pink cover with song lyrics and chords inside at the other end of the table. On it was the week old newspaper I brought up to my room to catch up on some current events although the paper wasn’t as fresh as it should be. Photocopied materials lie scattered everywhere, the useful ones are stacked against the wall while the unimportant, useless ones are still used as scratch papers for computations and draft paper for unspoken mumbles such as this one. I did not leave a single sheet unturned! (super duper me then) of course not, I probably have more than a thousand sheets on the table.
So, all in all, I have a messy table, I have a messed up life. But somehow I always find the things I wanted in the great mess, some people call it organized chaos, well maybe except for keys.

*I lifted all 2 inches of them and wondered now why I did, hehe. One of the turtles looks suspicious to me. It doesn’t look like a turtle although it has a shell. It’s more like a dinosaur, maybe a water dinosaur? It’s tail is longer, limbs aren’t as flappy like the other rubber creature and most importantly it doesn’t have a bump on its bump, lol, a bump on the middle of its shell to purposely serve as a spine. Not like dinosaurs don’t have spines.)